The Southern Calendar
- Monday, August 23, 2004
January 1- New Year's Day
Bring in the New Year with black-eyed peas and ham hocks. Eating black-eyed peas brings money and good luck. The ham hocks just make 'em taste better!
January 28 - Super Bowl
Southerners love their football! College football is preferred, but it is possible to get worked up for the Super Bowl with enough black-eyed peas and a Southern team in contention.
February 2 - Groundhog Day
Target Practice Day - We don't mess around with ground hogs or other varmints.
February 12 - Lincoln's Birthday
Southerners don't celebrate this one. He was born in Kentucky, but later turned Yankee.
February 14 - Valentine Day
Don't forget to go by the drugstore and get your honey a heart-shaped box of candy with a plastic flower on top to let her know how much you think of her.
February 22 - Washington's Birthday
Another Dead President's Day. He was officially Southern, but not a good ol' boy. Those ruffles and wigs ain't country...
March 17 - St. Patrick's Day
Many Southerners are Scotch Irish. Those who are not claim to be and have another good excuse to get wild and crazy (like they need a reason).
April 15 - Easter
Many Southerners are very serious about this day. Don't mess with the church picnic.
May 13 - Mother's Day
Be sure to call your mama or get her a card to thank her for birthin' you.
May 28 - Memorial Day
First holiday weekend of summer - Good time to take the boat and go to the lake.
June 17 - Father's Day
Get Pop some Red Man chewin' tobacco.
July 4 - Independence Day
Firecrackers - Careful with the those, just ask "lefty" or "nubs".
September 3 - Labor Day
Last weekend of summer - Another good time to take the boat and go to the lake.
October 8- Columbus Day
Last holiday to go fishing before cold weather.
October 31 - Halloween
Tradition is to play pranks and turn over the outhouse. Unfortunately, there are not many outhouses left these days, and this time-honored tradition is mostly a nostalgic memory.
November 11 - Veteran's Day
Watch a patriotic movie on television to show appreciation for veterans.
November 22 - Thanksgiving
Good day to take out the dogs and pickup truck and go rabbit hunting.
December 25 - Christmas
Get in the spirit by decorating the house with flashing lights inside and out. Put up a pine tree and decorate it. Wrap up the presents from Wal-Mart. Light fire in fireplace. (Important: Remember to open damper first this year.) Celebrate early and try to get rid of the visiting relatives before New Year's.
December 31 - New Year's Eve
Shoot fireworks. If you don't have any fireworks, just shoot the shotgun in the air at midnight . . .
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