AVERAGE USER RATING
Recently On Men
Featured Sponsors
Christian Living Resources, Bible Study Tools, Jesus Christ
Men: Manage Your Anger Like Jesus Did
Whitney Hopler
Crosswalk.com Contributing Writer
Editor's Note: The following is a report on the practical applications of Bill Perkins' new book, When Good Men Get Angry, (Tyndale House Publishers, 2009).
You can count on feeling angry sometimes in our fallen world. But if you allow anger to run wild through your mind, it will control your thoughts and behavior, filling your life with its destructive power and hurting people around you. Thanks to your relationship with Jesus, however, you can control your anger so it won’t control you.
When you understand your true identity in Christ – as a good man with access to God’s Spirit to help you overcome sin – you’ll be able to think and act more like Jesus when you get angry.
Here’s how you can learn to manage your anger like Jesus did while He was on earth:
Distinguish between good and bad forms of anger. Anger is a natural emotion that arises whenever you encounter a situation you perceive to be wrong. You can either process and express your anger in sinful ways – such as yelling at your wife or driving aggressively – or you can handle anger in ways that fuel a passion to advance God’s kingdom work. Ask God to help you see situations that make you angry from His perspective, so you’ll learn to recognize the difference between good and bad anger.
Understand your true identity. Your true identity is in Christ, but when you allow anger to take over your thoughts and behavior, you’re allowing your flesh to steal your identity and define who you are. When you get angry, remind yourself of who you really are, and pray for the Holy Spirit to empower you to subdue your anger and direct it in the right ways.
Turn to God for the respect you need. God has wired you as a man to need respect, but that need can become distorted so that any real or perceived act of disrespect can trigger inappropriate anger. If you’ve got a deficit in your respect bank, you may try to use anger to force others to treat you respectfully, but that will only lead them to disrespect you more. So whenever you feel anger due to disrespect, refuse to act on your initial impulse to explode in verbal or physical anger. Instead, remind yourself of how much God loves and respects you (it would help to memorize Bible verses like John 3:16 and John 17:23) and quickly pray for God’s help to act like a man of infinite worth even when you feel otherwise. Then determine whether the words and actions that have angered you are real or perceived acts of disrespect. In either case, don’t just react to your anger. Control your response as God leads you to do so.
Most Recent User Comments
Report this post
TLH42868
8/11/2009 12:30 PM
I FEEL ANGRY WHEN MY SON IS SO DISOBEDIENT TO HIS MOTHER.
YOU SEE I AM HIS STEP FATHER, BUT I THINK OF HIM AS MY OWN SON. HE SUFFERS FROM ADHD AND ADD. HE GETS VERY ANGRY ALOT, BUT ALOT OF TIMES IT IS OVER NOTHING.
SAYING THIS IT CAUSES ME TO FEEL ANGRY BECAUSE OF THE DISRESPECT HE GIVES HIS MOTHER AND GRANDPARENTS. HE IS 15 YRS OLD AND I UNDERSTAND THAT HE IS GOING THROUGH ALOT OF CHANGES. I AM PRYING FOR THIS AND WOULD LIKE YOUR PRAYERS ALSO.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WRITING ARTICLE ABOUT ISSUES LIKE THIS AND AM PRAYING FOR EACH MINISTRY I READ ABOUT AND HEAR ABOUT.
YOU SEE I AM HIS STEP FATHER, BUT I THINK OF HIM AS MY OWN SON. HE SUFFERS FROM ADHD AND ADD. HE GETS VERY ANGRY ALOT, BUT ALOT OF TIMES IT IS OVER NOTHING.
SAYING THIS IT CAUSES ME TO FEEL ANGRY BECAUSE OF THE DISRESPECT HE GIVES HIS MOTHER AND GRANDPARENTS. HE IS 15 YRS OLD AND I UNDERSTAND THAT HE IS GOING THROUGH ALOT OF CHANGES. I AM PRYING FOR THIS AND WOULD LIKE YOUR PRAYERS ALSO.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WRITING ARTICLE ABOUT ISSUES LIKE THIS AND AM PRAYING FOR EACH MINISTRY I READ ABOUT AND HEAR ABOUT.
- Read more feedback
- Give us your feedback on this article - (login required to comment)
Secondly, I greatly appreciate this article. I do find that the older I get, the more I have to work on my anger. I know it's a generational problem and appreciate the tips. I hope that I can break the cycle.