Many men I talk to have the same feelings of inadequacy regarding their fathering abilities. Without the proper training and role modeling, fathering can seem like an overwhelming responsibility. But as author Frank Pittmon says, "The guys who fear becoming fathers don’t understand that fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects men. The end product of child raising is not the child, but the parent."1

Let me say this: you are the man God chose to be the father of your children! God could have picked anyone on earth for this task, but in his infinite wisdom, he chose you. Even if you don’t have confidence in your fathering skills, God says you fit the bill perfectly for his plan for your family. He knows all your strengths and weaknesses, and he determined before time began that you would be the father of your children.

Does that make you feel better, or just more terrified? Relax—if you are reading this book, you are seeking knowledge and wisdom on how to become a better dad. That speaks well of your heart. If you are sincere and persevere, God will honor that worthy desire by working in your life to grant you that wish. I prayed many times to my heavenly Father for wisdom in raising my children, and I began to feel as though he had started honoring that request. Slowly but surely, I found myself recognizing "teaching moments" when they occurred. And by God’s grace, he spoke through my mouth on many of those occasions—surprising even me with the wisdom that popped out! Once I began living a life of intentional fathering instead of just reacting to what life threw at me, God began blessing my efforts.

Today, I love being a father. For years I dreaded the thought of parenting teenagers. Now, however, I find the challenges of raising teenagers to be exhilarating—even though these years are typically the most unsatisfying for a father. The natural curiosity teens have about life. The hormonal highs and lows. Launching them into the world as productive, happy adults. Believe it or not, I find all of these to be fun, though challenging, and I find great satisfaction when God gives me the wisdom to address these needs.

He can give you the same fulfillment in your family. Keeping a good attitude is half the battle.

Believe me when I say I know how tough it is being a man and a father today. You feel like you give and work and struggle and there’s never enough of you to go around. The pressures are unrelenting. And yet you are so important that you are nearly irreplaceable in the lives of your children—especially your son. Fatherhood is a privilege given by God, and with that privilege comes the power to impact lives. Exercised responsibly for good, that power can lead to God’s blessing on you and your family.

Privilege, power, responsibility, sacrifice. They’re all part of the same package. They all belong to a father.

Be a man. Stand tall. Give your son an example of masculinity that will survive down through the generations. I’ve heard men speak in reverent tones of their grandfathers or even great-grandfathers they’ve never met. The power of the masculine legacy they left behind has cured and hardened down through the ages like a concrete foundation of manliness.

Rick Johnson is the founder of Better Dads, a fathering skills program designed to equip men to be more engaged in the lives of their children. Rick develops and delivers father training workshops for businesses, churches, schools, and other organizations across the Northwest. He previously authored That's My Son: How Moms Can Influence Boys to Become Men of Character. Rick, his wife Suzanne, and their two children live in Gresham, Oregon.

Used with permission of Revell, a division of Baker Publishing Group.