Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. Galatians 6:1

 

The following is a suggested outline for your message of hope. Sexual sin isn’t an appropriate subject for young children, so you may consider making an announcement 1-2 weeks prior that the topic is PG-13, and parents should have their little ones in Sunday school that day.

 

First, set the standard.
In a 2003 Barna survey, 28 percent of Christians said looking at pictures with nudity or sexually explicit behavior was morally acceptable. God’s standard, found in Matthew 5:28, is that lust in the heart is the same as committing adultery. The married man who uses porn is sinning against God – and is unfaithful to his wife. Christians aren’t immune from our culture’s “if it feels good do it” mentality, and those who’ve allowed this lie to influence their thinking need to hear God’s truth.

 

Show how destructive sexual sin is

“Just porn” takes out marriages and families; the tragedy is that most guys don’t realize it until it’s too late. At a 2003 meeting of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, two thirds of the 350 divorce lawyers who attended said Internet porn contributed to more than half of the divorce cases they handled. The aftershocks from porn addiction in a marriage are little different from the fallout from the physical act of adultery; there are many stories in Scripture that show the devastating consequences of sexual sin (such as Samson and David’s).

 

Let them know they’re not alone.

Because porn or sex addiction is so rarely discussed in the church, most guys mistakenly assume that “I’m the only one with a lust problem.” This lie keeps many trapped in shame, because if “I’m the only one” then I dare not tell someone for fear of being branded with a scarlet P. Exposing the statistics that 50 percent of Christian men have an issue with porn will show them they’re not “the only one,” and encourage them to reach out for help. One powerful way to do this is for one man to share his struggle with lust with the congregation; when one person steps forward and confesses his weakness it gives others the courage to do the same.

 

After opening the door, point the way out:

 

1. Isolation is death

All who struggle with sex or porn addiction are isolated, and few have friends who they can be vulnerable with. James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one other so you may be healed,” and in Proverbs 28:13 we read “he who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion.” When we keep our sins a secret they have more power over us; exposing our struggles to others dissolves the shame (Psalms 32:1-5) and breaks the stronghold of lust in the heart. And, when others pray for us in our specific area of weakness as is mentioned in the second half of James 5:16, the Holy Spirit touches our heart where we need it with His power and grace.