Poorly Made, “Doogal" Should Stay in the Memory Box
- Thursday, May 11, 2006
DVD Release Date: May 16, 2006
Genre: Animated Action/Adventure (Children's)
Run Time: 85 min.
Directors: Jean Duval, Frank Passingham, Dave Borthwick
Actors: Daniale Tay, Ian McKellen, Jon Stewart, Chevy Chase, Whoopi Goldberg, Kevin Smith, Judi Dench, William H. Macy, Jimmy Fallon
It’s unfortunate that filmmakers keep cranking out kid movies with little-to-no story, superficial characters, trite dialogue and lousy animation – just because they’re kids and, I guess, nobody seems to care. I’m sure that over in Europe, a lot of 40-somethings have really been looking forward to the film version of their favorite childhood TV show, too. So, for you disappointed Frenchies and Brits, I have two words from this side of the pond: “Scooby Doo.”
Doogal (voiced by Daniel Tay) is a ditzy little dog who can’t stay away from candy or his owner, Florence (Kylie Minogue). When Doogal tries to steal some candy, he causes Florence and her friends to get stuck on a merry-go-round, which is then frozen by an evil sorcerer. The sorcerer’s name is Zeebad (Jon Stewart) and he has a tiny little head, a Magnum P.I. mustache, and a spring for a body. (Yes, a spring, as in “boing-boing.” Go figure.) Zeebad’s body spring looks exactly like the body spring of his adversary, Zebedee (Ian McKellen) – apparently to save them from the hassle of inventing another character. He also has a Magnum P.I. mustache, but he’s red, and his special power is fire, whereas Zeebad is blue and uses cold as his special power. Oh, and when they “fight,” they bounce around. But wait – it gets even better.
Now Zeebad, who’s into freezing, is going after world domination, like most villains, and needs these three diamonds. Diamonds of color, no less – as in blue, pink and yellow. (Which, in my book, would actually make them a sapphire, a garnet and a tiger’s eye, respectively. But who cares, right?) Now what these “diamonds” have to do with world domination, much less a merry-go-round, is beyond me. But hey, this is a movie for little kids. So who cares.
After Zeebad freezes the merry-go-round, locking Heather and her friends inside, Doogal goes on a quest for the diamonds, with Zeebad in hot pursuit. He’s accompanied by a guitar-playing-stoner-dude (without the pot)-rabbit named Dylan (Jimmy Fallon), an operatic cow named Ermintrude (Whoopi Goldberg) and Brian, the shy snail who adores Ermintrude (William H. Macy). Oh, and let’s not forget the moose-with-gas (played by – oh, why am I not surprised – Kevin Smith) and, gee, a train with gas (Chevy Chase), too. Anybody else out there with gas? Because the producers are auditioning for their next film. The more flatulent, the better.
Back to the “plot.” The idea is that – follow closely now – if Doogal can get the diamonds, he can save Heather and her friends from freezing to death in the iced-up merry-go-round. Of course, why someone didn’t just tap on the ice and break it, I have no idea. It wasn’t even thick. But, like I said, who cares. Kids have no brains, right?
Well, if this plot sounds familiar, then bingo! Or, should I say, “boing!” you win world domination. Because, of course, it is a ripped off version of “Lord of the Rings.” Only without the good characters, dialogue, acting, direction, cinematography and anything else that can and should create a decent film. Add to that, bad animation and really bad jokes, and you’ve got “Doogal.” Just get a load of some of these pitiful puns:
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