• Respect your husband. Decide to treat your husband with respect whether or not you think he deserves it. Respect him because God created him and loves him. Choose to obey God by offering your husband respect no matter what your circumstances. Ask God to give you the positive attitude you need to make that choice. Notice your husband's good qualities and overlook some of his faults. Know that you can love your husband even when he's wrong, as God loves him unconditionally. Regularly take an inventory of the blessings God has given you. Then take the time to thank Him for them. Strive to be content and at peace. Depend on Jesus to help you through whatever struggles you face. Ask God what He wants you to learn from your trials. Keep your eyes focused beyond your circumstances to God.

• Encourage your husband. Remember that words have great power to either build someone up or tear someone down. Speak encouraging words to your husband whenever you can. Strive to be the companion your husband desires. Schedule a date with him at least once a month, and take anniversary trips together if possible. Build as much time into your schedule as you can simply to be together in relaxing ways, doing things you both enjoy. Regularly make eye contact, touch each other, smile at each other, and pray together. Work to build a great friendship with your husband.

• Fan the flames of your physical attraction. Spend time with God in prayer to develop the inner beauty that comes from the fruit of the Spirit. Take care of the body God has given - the temple of His Spirit - by making healthy choices and striving to look your best. Get enough exercise and sleep; eat wholesome, unprocessed foods; update your hairstyle, makeup, and wardrobe; and smile. Don't use sex as a weapon by withholding it from your husband when you're angry at him. Instead, work at becoming a great lover and see how the connection you develop with your husband improves your relationship. Flirt with your husband during the day in anticipation of a romantic evening. Be creative about your lovemaking places and techniques.

• Manage money responsibly. Ask God to help you distinguish between wants and needs and develop wise plans for spending, saving, giving, and investing. Work together with your husband to create a budget and maintain it. Be loving and respectful as you discuss financial matters.

• Manage your household well. When dividing up your domestic tasks, take into account the unique skills and interests that you and your husband have. If both of you find a particular chore distasteful, work it out without grumbling or nagging. Decide to serve by always striving to do more than your fair share. Organize your possessions so that everything has its proper place. Organize your time by choosing wisely how you will spend it.

• Grow spiritually. Spend regular time in prayer to develop the intimacy with God that will help you become a more positive person. Pray for your husband's physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. Read the Bible regularly and ask God what He would like you to learn from what you read. In all you do, view your husband as a gift from God and strive to be a good gift to him.

Adapted from The Power of a Positive Wife, copyright 2003 by Karol Ladd. Published by Howard Publishing Co., Inc., West Monroe, La., www.howardpublishing.com.

Best-selling author Karol Ladd offers lasting hope and biblical truth to women around the world through her positive book series. A gifted communicator and dynamic leader, Karol is founder and president of Positive Life Principles, Inc., a resource company offering strategies for success in both home and work. Her vivacious personality makes her a popular speaker to women's organizations, church groups and corporate events. She is co-founder of a character-building club for young girls called USA Sonshine Girls and serves on several educational boards. Karol is a frequent guest on radio and television programs. Her most valued role is that of wife to Curt and mother to daughters Grace and Joy. Visit her Web site at www.PositiveLifePrinciples.com.