Your Christmas Doesn’t Have to be Perfect

After a heartfelt time with my sisters, last Sunday I had yet another opportunity to follow in my mom’s footsteps, let go of perfectionism, and focus on the heart of the evening.

Sunday night we had guests over for dinner, and I didn’t clean my house!

It was an internal war inside – do I vacuum, dust and clean – or just let it go?

Would I rather continue on with what had already been a peaceful day – or kick it into high gear, running around crazily trying to make everything look “just right?” I won’t even mention what kind of mood that puts the whole family in. Did our guests even care? Or even notice?

To some, the Christmas season particularly brings stress, dread and worry. I think of Narnia without Aslan – “always winter but never Christmas.” We lose our focus as life gets hurried and complicated. We dash around doing things that really don’t matter (like cleaning my house before the guests arrive!), and then our perspective shifts. We get so caught up in our present circumstances that we can’t see beyond our difficulties.

In preparing for these guests, I had been focusing all day on “hope,” as I’ve been feeling hurts and pains that people around us have been experiencing this season. If we lose our hope – what else is there? Where do we turn?

Some call it optimism, but when I look deep into the Christ-child’s eyes, I call it hope. It is enough assurance for me that I can put the dreariness of Christmas aside: money, commercialism, and even too much tradition, or making sure my house looks perfect for all the “hub-bub” taking place.

So how did this evening turn out? We had such a great time with our guests. At one point I found myself looking down at the un-vacuumed carpet. For a split second I was embarrassed. Then I looked up into the faces of those around our table and my perspective shifted back into place.

It is through my faith - which is the basis for my hope – that my priorities are put into proper perspective. It’s not about the crumbs on the floor or the unorganized piles – it’s about the hope that resides in each one of us.

Even when life doesn’t seem perfect, that hope is enough for me!

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Sandy Coughlin is a wife and mother of 3. She loves her family and loves blessing other people's lives by entertaining in her home. Sandy’s husband, Paul, (who used to be the reluctant entertainer) has come on board, and they often offer hospitality together. Sandy and Paul co-authored a book called Married but Not Engaged (Bethany House, Aug. 2006). It's written to women who are married to "checked out" or emotionally absent men and who want to create a more satisfying, intimate relationship. This article was adapted from Sandy’s regularly updated blog “4 Reluctant Entertainers,” which you can visit at www.reluctantentertainer.com.  Get more information on Married but Not Engaged by clicking here.