J:  Yeah, right, same here.  How come?

F:  I just...  So that was a big question that I had to grapple with for quite a while and I finally started writing about it and talking about it and, "Frank, what, why didn't you ever say anything about it."  And that's wrong, as bizarre as it seems.  So, that's why I say the first thing that parents needs to do is don't excuse it, don't blink you're eye at it, don't just say you'll outgrow it.  Do something about it because it's wrong.  And then you hear this other thing that comes along, "Well, it'll make you strong."  Or, you hear this a lot from Christians, "Well, the Lord uses it."  And I have to keep coming back, "You're missing the point.  It's wrong!"  How many times do I have to say it.  It's wrong and when I give the talk I go through it and say, "Is it right to injure someone, to inflict upon them wounds that they will carry for the rest of their lives?  That will have an affect

on the risks they take, the decisions they make, the people they associate with.  The social situations they shy away from.  The false image of what they can and cannot do.  Yes, it's wrong.  All right, if it's wrong then why do we allow it?  We clothe our kids, we bundle them up for the winter, we tell them to look both ways for traffic before they cross the street, we give them vitamins, we make sure they eat properly, we do everything to take care of them and then we send them into an environment where they are going to get stabbed through the spirit and then we send them again.  So, that's my first thing to say to parents.  You get proactive.  You do something about it.  You find out what the problem is and you stop it.