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I get a lot of questions about the writing life from very interested folks. Some romanticize it as if its an easy, dreamy career filled only with paychecks and fame and unicorns. But there are inconvenient truths about writing that nobody tells you until you actually step into it. I don't write these to discourage you, if God has called you to nurture your gift, but simply to give a realistic view of what to expect: 

1) You will not get famous. The truth is that most writers are not bestsellers. And even of those who make the New York Times list, few, if any, would be recognized in Walmart. But if you really have a gift for story or have a message you want to put on paper, you don't write to be famous, you write because you can't not write. Sure, I'd be lying if I said it didn't give me a thrill to see my name on a book in a bookstore or a byline on an article in a famous magazine. Yeah, that's cool. But the truth is that unless you beat the odds, you won't ever be famous. You might get a few speaking gigs and some Internet love, but like everyone else, you'll be obscure. That's okay, though, because fame is a difficult beast to handle and God will use you best when you are humble.

2) You will not get rich. I always know an amateur writer, because they say things like "And I'm hoping, with this book, to pay off my house" or "I'm hoping this book will fund a new wing of my church." Um ... I hate to break it to you. This just won't happen. I mean it could happen if every right circumstance happens and you hit the bestseller lists. But those odds are tall. Those outside the publishing world think authors make a killing, that having a book means you're rich. No, typically the advances and royalties provided a little extra cash and there are ways to make extra money editing and writing articles, but it's a small percentage of writers who actually support their families solely by writing. (And please ignore those goofy ads that tell you can get rich quick by writing. You can't.) But here's the thing, you aren't writing to be rich, are you? Sure, it's nice to be paid for efforts, but there are a lot easier ways to make a buck. You write, because you have a gift God has given you, because you want to encourage and inspire, and ultimately because you want to glorify God. (And by the way, it's such bad form to ask a writer how much he makes per book. I know you really want to ask, but it's as rude as asking a lady her age. Don't do it.)

3) You are not Hemingway. At least not yet. If you really want to write, you must know that it's a journey of learning and growing. The first things you write will be terrible. But you must get them on paper so you can see how terrible they are and improve them to make them less terrible. This is why you might start your writing career, not with a magnum opus of a book, but with small things that give you opportunity to be published, but not widely. You might start blogging consistently to a nonexistent audience. You might start editing your community or church newsletter. You might start writing fundraising letters. I cut my teeth taking sermons that were not my own and converting them to devotionals. I wrote fundraising letters, TV and radio ad copy, back cover copy, website copy. Fun stuff that wasn't even what I wanted to write. But the practice and the deadlines were good for me. It's important to realize that you are on a journey, that you are not Hemingway, so you are open to criticism, mentoring, and polishing. If you are not open to these things and you think you are Hemingway, you will not be a professional writer and you will not be read, at least widely. 

4) You must fight for space to do your work. Because you will not get rich writing, it's likely that you will have to write in the margins of your daily life. This means you'll have to create time and space to do it, in between your job, your family obligations, and your church responsibilities. Jon Acuff, in his book Quitter, calls this "hustling at 5 a.m." In other words, if you really want to do this, get up early and write (or in my case, stay up late). And you'll have to constantly discipline yourself and fight for it. There will be times you think it's unessential or crazy. People will call you crazy. They will think it's frivolous. But if you have a gift and have been called by God to write, you will have to fight for it, both in time and space. And by fight, I don't mean being an irascible fellow but someone who prioritizes it above other entertainment options and pursuits. You will also have to fight for resources, coming up with creative ways to fund writer's conferences and other learning and growing venues. This writing life is not a dream that takes place in your beach house in Cabo. It will involve late nights and early mornings and deadlines and rushed jobs. It will mean lots of coffee, lots of work, lots of times cranking out stuff that you don't like. Writing is a wonderful exercise, but it takes work. It takes blood, sweat, and tears. But if God has given you this gift, this is what you sacrifice to bring glory to Him.

5) You will not be validated by getting published. The dream of every writer is to be published and to see their work distributed on a wide scale. This is not wrong or sinful or unbiblical. If God has given you a message, you should want it spread far and wide. 

But let me assure you: getting published will not validate you. You are not somebody because you have a book with your name on it. You are somebody because God uniquely formed you before foundation of the world (read Psalm 139). You are somebody because, if you have put your faith in Jesus Christ, you have been chosen, adopted, redeemed and rescued. Your validation comes from something much higher than a book contract. Your validation comes from a God who loves you unconditionally. He accepts you, before your book contract and after it or if you never get one. On the flip side, getting published doesn't bestow rights or privileges or "airs" above other of God's people. You should still take the garbage out for your wife. You still need to repent and apologize when you sin. You still shouldn't berate the cabbie or the airline clerk or the police officer. Yes, we know who you are. You are a sinner God rescued from sin.

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"And this is why so many people reject the church ..." 

How often have you read this in the last year? In the last month? In the last week? It's a premise for a wide variety of ideas about the church, a repeated refrain that has almost become a cliche. It goes something like this. The church has a bad public image because it is too narrow-minded, too political, too legalistic, too patriarchal, and too a lot of bad things. And there seems to be research to bolster these arguments. Seems every day, some organization is releasing a poll that shows the church is out of touch and must change. It can be dizzying, actually because if you actually followed every new conflicting prescription, you'd be spinning in circles. Sometimes I imagine how the apostles managed without all that research to help them out. 

Now, don't get me wrong. We need to be wary of our standing before people (Colossians 4:5), we must adorn the gospel well (Titus 2:10; 1 Peter 3:3-4), we must strive, as Paul to be "all things to all men.(1 Corinthians 9:19-23)" (Though, let's be honest, this has been stretched to defend some pretty crazy church ideas.). It's important that we conduct ourselves in a way that demonstrates the attractiveness of our faith. 

However, I think the church is a little obsessed with its image. I think it's convenient for us to beat up on ourselves. It's fashionable to put out a passive-aggressive tweet or Facebook post that hates on some hypocrisy in the larger church. 

The truth is that while the church is often clumsy, sinful, and sometimes irrelevant, we are God's called-out body. We are His Bride. Furthermore, we have to reconcile ourselves to the idea that the radical discipleship Jesus calls us to is against the ethos of the world. In fact, we are told many, many times in the New Testament that if we follow Jesus, we will not be liked by the world. 

Consider these words spoken by Jesus himself: 

and you will be hated by all for my name's sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. Matthew 10:22 (ESV) 

A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a servant above his master. It is enough for the disciple to be like his teacher, and the servant like his master. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub, how much more will they malign those of his household. Matthew 10:24-25 (ESV) 

How's that for branding? Jesus said that if we truly lived out calling as disciples, it wouldn't result in the world liking us more, but in them hating us more. In fact, the Scriptures tell us if the world likes us too much, it should call into question our Christian commitment: 

You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. James 4:4 (ESV) 

This is why I question our obsession over our reputation or opinion in the larger culture. The Bible says that the more try to be liked, the farther we move from friendship with God. Now to be sure, sometimes Christians are disliked, not for their Christian witness, but because they are jerks. They don't radiate with the love of Christ. But quite often, Christians are disliked ...  because they are Christians. So we can change our church styles, we can do more works in the community, we can even call ourselves "Christ followers" (all good things to do), and yet, still, the world will hate us. Why? Because as Romans 8:7 says, the unredeemed mind is "hostile to God." 1 Corinthians 2:14 says that the carnal or fleshly mind "cannot discern" the things of God. 

This explains media bias against Christians. This explains why your neighbor thinks you are plum crazy for going to church. This explains why our belief that Jesus is the only way really hacks people off. 

So how should this inform our faith? First, we shouldn't begin our ministry with the premise of "how can I get them to like me more?" Yes, we should build bridges and relationships for gospel advance. Yes, we should love our enemies. Yes, we should get our hands and feet dirty in service of the needy. 

But not so people like us. Let's do this because our Lord calls us to. Otherwise, beginning with the premise of "I have to repair the Christian brand," leads us down a slippery slope of doctrinal impurity. We are tempted to jettison hard truths about God, especially those that are unpalatable in this age. In a sense, we have made the unredeemed person, at enmity with God, head of our theology department, chair of our worship team, and architect of our ministry model. 

Secondly, we should disabuse ourselves of the mythical "early church" model. I think the book of Acts gives important and powerful lessons for today's church. I believe we'd do well to "go back" to some of the fervent prayer and radical discipleship these people practiced. However, let's remember that these folks were not well-loved by the larger culture. They were not liked by the world. We have this notion that in the early church, there was no infighting, no agendas, no power plays and that these people were so selfless and broadminded that the world just loved them. After all, we say, they met in houses and just loved on each other. Right? 

Well, no. First of all, if you read the epistles, you'll find that the early church suffered with the same issues our churches endure today. And secondly, let's remember that most of the early church were rounded up, arrested, and killed for their faith. 

How's that for branding? Their brand was terrible. But their discipleship was radical. 

Christians should be concerned somewhat about their perception in the world. No doubt. We are the representatives of Christ in the world. But let's not be so obsessed with how the world views us. Because persecution is not a sign of unfaithfulness, but of faithfulness. 

I have a feeling that American Christians are going to have to come to terms with this idea or else risk losing their faith all together. 

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I'm thirty-four and so Mother's Day has endured several new seasons for me. There was the season of my birth, which I don't remember, of course. Then there was the season of childhood where I came home from church on Mother's Day with handmade cards, where I partnered with my dad and siblings to make meals, create artwork, and honor my wonderful mom. There was the season of junior high and into high school where I offered the obligatory thanks to Mom, but didn't fully appreciate her investment in my life. And then of course there is the college years where I'm pursing my dreams and slowly begin to appreciate Mom.

Then there where new and fresh seasons of Mother's Day. When I married Angela, I added another mother to my life. Angela's mom, Linda, was a wonderful new addition. And then, when we began having children, Mother's Day was given a whole new meaning. The first year of parenthood I didn't fully appreciate this. That Mother's Day I went about as usual, buying gifts for my own mother and making sure we took care of Angela's mom. Big mistake. I had forgotten that this was a day to honor my wife, who is the mother of my children, who was laboring hard to make our house a home for the children God entrusted me. It was a lesson I didn't ever forget.

This year, as Mother's Day rolls around, we're experiencing yet another season. In January of this year, Linda Sullivan, Angela's mom, my mother-in-law, slipped from this life into glory. It was a tragic loss for us. This Mother's Day will be especially difficult for Angela, the first without the woman who so shaped her life. It's also a hard day for me, to lose a wonderful friend, listening ear, compassionate soul, cheerleader, and mentor. The ten years I knew Linda were good years. We wish we had at least ten more with her, but we don't.

In a way, the varied seasons of Mother's Day are helping to shape my own ministry to others. Until this year I didn't realize the mixed feelings or even outright pain most feel on this holiday when it seems everyone is celebrating motherhood. If you've lost a mother, this particular Sunday in May revives those emotions afresh. If you've experienced the sting of infertility, this is a day in which you're not sure how to act. Anger, jealousy, sadness, embarrassment, grief. If you've lost a child, you may just want to roll right past this Sunday in the calendar.

As I get up to preach on Sunday, I hope to offer Jesus as solution to the empty parts on Mother's Day. I hope each new seasons allows me, like Paul, to care for God's children "like a nursing mother taking care of her children" (1 Thessalonians 2:7). But ultimately, I know that each loss we experience on Mother's Day is a fresh reminder of God's sovereignty over all things and that even the best relationships, the ones we've experienced with our mothers or mothers-in-law are but small pleasures pointing us to the ultimate joy found in relationship to Christ, who fills all the empty places in our hearts.

Sunday, I will do my best to help Angela grieve the loss of her mother and to honor Angela's own efforts as mother of our four small children. Like most on this holiday, I suppose we'll limp along less triumphalist as we may have in the past when everything was just right on Mother's Day. And I encourage you to do the same.

When Sunday approaches, make sure you give your mother and your mother-in-law quality time and affirm your gratitude for their contribution to your life. If you're married, honor your wife. If you have children, doubly honor your wife. And when the day is over, whisper a silent prayer of thanks to your Heavenly Father, who sustains and holds all things in His loving hands.

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"People are tired of the culture war." "The culture war is over." "Christians need to stop being so political." "Christians are damaging the brand with their involvement in politics."

Have you heard any of these statements lately? I have. And I've made these statements. Our generation is in the midst of a good discussion on the nexus between faith and politics. We're a bit weary of a previous generation's highly partisan nature. We feel the Christian brand has been badly damaged. We're not culture warriors. 

Or so we think. Except isn't interesting how hypocritical we actually are. I was thinking about the other day. There are some issues that have been labeled as partisan and divisive. For instance, to be loudly pro-life is to be considered too partisan. Stop fighting the culture wars. Preach the gospel instead. Love people. 

And yet, if you were to replace your advocacy for the unborn with, say, advocacy for starving children, both here and overseas, you'd be lauded as a hero. You might even have one of those blog widgets where you encourage everyone to get involved. You'd be considered a compassionate Christian -- a different kind of Christian than those angry, right-wing types that talk too much about those babies being killed every day in increasingly heinous ways. 

Now, don't get me wrong. Child poverty is a tragic social ill, one that the Church should quickly work to alleviate. Those organizations that compel us to sponsor children are on the side of angels. 

But ... isn't this a social issue too? Isn't this a cultural thing, too? Aren't those who harang the church for not doing more to alleviate poverty, aren't they culture warriors like the pro-life folks are? 

Do you see how easily we dismiss issues we wish would go away? Or issues we lazily engage without fully knowing the facts? 

In a sense we are all culture warriors. There are issues we are all passionate about, about which we compel our leaders to act. But I sense, in my generation, a bit of smugness. That we're not going to do things the way our fathers did. We're smarter, better, more Christlike. 

Perhaps we'll avoid some of the unhealthy lust for power of the past. Maybe the Christian brand might be more distanced from the conservative movement. Perhaps we'll talk less about "swinging elections" and more about gospel transformation. If so, that's a good change.

But if we are to be faithful to what God has called us to do, there will be times when our advocacy will have the media and the opinion makers singing our praises. And there will be other moments when our faithful positions will bring us derision. 

Which will make us, yes even us enlightened ones, culture warriors. We'd better get used to it.