Raise a Godly Daughter in an Ungodly World
- Saturday, June 16, 2007
The culture your daughter must face today is often hostile to God’s values. Too many girls are simply sucked into the culture, losing their virtue in the process. But with your help, your daughter can counteract the culture and live the life God wants for her.
Here are some ways you can raise a godly daughter in an ungodly world:
• Prepare for battle. Don’t sit back and allow your daughter to be indoctrinated into the culture’s current popular thinking by default. Commit to investing as much time and energy as it takes to train her to counteract the culture with God’s timeless truths. Recognize the great power you have as her mother to influence your daughter. Model a life of faith in action for her, and regularly discuss biblical principles with her.
• Monitor her outside influences. Know who your daughter’s friends are and what values they embrace. Help her eliminate negative influences and build a peer group of strong, godly friends. Set boundaries on the types of television shows, movies, music, magazines, books, and Web sites your daughter accesses. Regularly discuss media content with her and talk about how it relates to her faith.
• Help her choose courage over conformity. Teach your daughter how to be in the world without being of the world. Help her understand how to be transformed by the renewing of her mind. Explain to her why God set up moral absolutes of right and wrong so she doesn’t cave into the fuzzy thinking of our culture’s moral relativism. Demonstrate in your own life how to consistently follow God’s Word. Acknowledge times when your faith has been inconsistent, ask your daughter’s forgiveness for not modeling the integrity you want her to see, and ask God to help you do better.
• Teach her how to define her true self worth. Explain to your daughter that the world’s formulas for defining self worth don’t work. Let her know that her worth doesn’t equal what she looks like (God is more concerned with her inner heart than her outward appearance), what she does (God cares more about who she is than her accomplishments), or what other people think of her (it only matters what God thinks). Tell her that God’s formula is the only one that works: Her worth equals who she is in Jesus Christ.
• Refute myths about sex with the truth. Realize that you should be your daughter’s primary source of information about sexuality. Strive to provide her with lots of accurate information. Refute the common myths that "Everyone is doing it," "As long as you love the person, it’s okay to have sex," "It’s not sex unless you go all the way," and "Condoms protect against unwanted pregnancies and STDs."
Help her understand some of the reasons she should wait until she’s married to have sex: Her body is not her own; it belongs to God. A large majority of teen girls who have sex regret it. She will likely get a bad reputation if she does have premarital sex. One in four sexually active teens gets a sexually transmitted disease every year. Forty percent of sexually active girls will become pregnant at least once by age 20.
Help your daughter see that God’s call for sexual purity is not exclusively meant for sexual intercourse, but for all sexual activity. Encourage her to make a personal pledge to God to save sex for marriage, and to seek out friends who have also made such pledges themselves. Let her know that God created sex as something beautiful to be enjoyed in the confines of marriage, and that if the gift if misused, it can have devastating physical, emotional, and spiritual consequences.
• Encourage her to dress modestly. Explain to your daughter why dressing modestly is an important way to honor God with the body He has given her. Help her understand that immodest clothes send wrong messages to guys and stimulate them to think lustfully toward her. Let her know why choosing to be modest is a vital part of respecting her dignity as a person. Ask God to give her the confidence she needs to refrain from seeking attention in the wrong way, such as by dressing immodestly to flaunt her body and gain approval from others.
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