Pornography: No Longer a Dirty Little Secret
- Friday, October 10, 2003
But unlike drugs, pornography is available 24X7, and isn't constrained by cost or even the stigma attached to entering an adult bookstore. Today, anyone with access to the Internet has an x-rated shop in his or her home. Two clicks of a mouse and you are open for business, complete with images limited only by one's imagination.
Taking Action Begins with YOU
Ask yourself some basic questions: What am I doing to stop using pornography? How am I protecting myself from getting started? How is my church dealing with this issue? Most importantly, as pop psychologist Dr. Phil asks his clients on Oprah Winfrey's television show: "How's that workin' for ya'?" If we're honest, we have to admit what we're doing isn't working.
We need a new approach.
When we are sick, we see a doctor. When we suffer emotionally, we seek a counselor. But when the problem is porn, we battle in silence and darkness. Well, how's that workin' for ya?
If you are ready to get serious about a serious problem, here are three very tangible things you can do today:
1. Find a friend. It is as simple as saying to someone you trust, "I won't go it alone any longer. I want you to ask me the tough questions. I commit to tell you the truth, but I need your support and encouragement. Will you be my accountability partner?"
God has placed people in our lives as His agents of encouragement and support, choosing to do His work through others. Our prayers for help are often answered in the form of a friend.
Rock climbers partner because two on a mountain are safer than one. My friend, even if porn isn't your problem, you are living on a precipice. What will it take before you find a partner-someone in whom you can completely trust?
We have compiled accountability questions, even worksheets you can use as part of an accountability relationship. But a partnership can only begin by asking someone to come alongside you. Ask someone today.
If you don't know who to turn to, call NetAccountability at 1-888-580-PURE. Press "3" and then "1" to talk live with someone, 24 hours a day. Help is only a phone call away.
2. Use accountability software. Your accountability relationship deserves complete honesty, especially with regard to Internet activity. NetAccountability (see www.NetAccountability.com) has developed an inexpensive, simple tool that logs every site you go to on the web, and highlights sites that are questionable or explicit in nature. You and your accountability partner should sign up and guarantee that, when it comes to online activity, no stone is left unturned.
You may not feel your accountability partnership needs this kind of support. Use it anyway - not because you have to, but because too much is at stake to leave anything to chance.
3. Pass it on. You are not alone.Choosing accountability over pornography takes courage, the kind of courage our churches need more than ever if we have any hope of overcoming porn's insidious impact. But don't simply attend to your own needs. Talk to your friends and gain their commitment to take these same three steps. Encourage your pastor and church leaders to talk about this issue.
NetAccountability has posted on their website an "Open Letter to the Church" penned by Chuck Swindoll. You are invited to co-sign the letter with him. They have also posted a number of white papers, books, seminars and workshop information, and an array of other resources available for those who are ready to take pornography as seriously as those who create and distribute it.
Regardless of your situation, Christ offers freedom, hope, joy, love, and grace. But you must take the first step. Stop settling for as much victory as you can muster on your own. Start acting as though your very life is at stake.
Your future may well depend on it.
Scott Covington is CEO & Executive Director of NetAccountability, a ministry providing research, reach and resources for a revolution toward sexual purity. Scott can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Curt Swindoll is CEO of Cool Strategies and an Advisory Board Member of NetAccountability. Cool Strategies is a consultancy which works with mission-minded organizations in the areas of strategic planning, business development, organizational leadership, and marketing. Curt can be reached at email@example.com.
Copyright (c) 2003 Covington and NetAccountability
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