Have you ever wondered why moms, homeschooling moms not excluded, heap condemnation upon themselves? For some reason, we often feel that we are failing our children if we don't do this or that. I often pray that I do not fail my children. More often than not, the answer that comes to me is NOT in an affirmative response, but in a response that leads me to freedom.

Just last week, I was preparing to go to speak at two conferences in a couple of weeks. The condemnation of myself began full force. I was feeling like a failure as a mom, as a home schooler, and as a wife. Pressure was coming in from all sides and I was buckling. I was feeling like there was NOTHING that I was doing that was right. I commented to someone that I felt it was probably God trying to keep me humble. Quickly I was rebuked that God does not tear us down to humble us. He lifts Himself up, which by the very majesty of Him, sends us to our knees.

That was where I went. I went to my knees. But you know what? I was fully expecting God to tell me that I am indeed a failure. I was expecting Him to tell me that I should give it all up, throw in the towel, so to speak. But He didn't. He told me that He is expecting to use me anyway. He reminded me through several means, that he takes the ordinary, the failing, the poor, the weak, and He uses them for His own glory.

Have you ever wondered why. standing at the feet of God, Moses told God that he was not the man God wanted? Have you ever laughed, just a bit, when you thought of Jeremiah saying, "Behold, I cannot speak, for I am a youth." (Like God didnt know?!)

As I read about these GREAT pillars of faith, I tend to forget that God calls all of us as well. And how do we respond? Do we respond with, "Yes, Lord?" Or do we say, "But, I am just" or "But you don't know that I have this failing." Of course He knows, and He calls us anyway.

Just this week, I was reading Vickie Farris book, "A Mom Just Like You." As I read I began to wonder when she planted a bug in my house to know what I was thinking, feeling and experiencing.

It was as I read about cereal, that I suddenly felt a great burden lifted from my life. You see, I preach about the benefits of a good breakfast. I talk to women about not feeding their children cereal for breakfast. And here I was secretly hoping every time Steve went to the store, that he would bring home cereal for the kids.

I had become involved in a couple of big projects and found myself using the breakfast time at our house to have my quiet time. It only worked for me if the kids could manage their own breakfast. Day after day, I would read my Bible and feel guilty about what my kids were eating. For awhile I stopped using that time as my quiet time. Do you think that guilt was from the Lord? I don't think so. But as I read Vickie relaying how it is just easier for her at this point in her life to give her kids cereal for breakfast, I was suddenly free.

I suddenly realized that not everything I do or don't do, is a conviction from the Lord that I must adhere to rigidly. I am not a failure as a parent if I give my kids cereal, or sit them at a table with textbooks, or even if I let my little ones watch a movie so I can instruct my older children.

I am looking at what I consider a failing, and see it for what it is. Sometimes, I really do need to work on an area, but often it is just my own insecurities that keep me from being the best mom I can be. Even if I feed them cereal for breakfast.