As I entered Heaven's door,
Not by the beauty of it all,
By the lights or its decor.
Who made me sputter and gasp--
The thieves, the liars, the sinners,
The alcoholics, the trash.
Who swiped my lunch money twice.
Next to him was my old neighbor
Who never said anything nice.
Was rotting away in hell,
Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,
Looking incredibly well.
I would love to hear your take.
How'd all these sinners get up here?
God must've made a mistake.
So somber? Give me a clue."
"Hush child," said He. "They're all in shock.
No one thought they'd see you!"