NPR Strikes Again

NPR (National Public Radio) features various local shows, one of which entitled, Colorado Matters, discusses items of so-called interest to Coloradoans.   During one of last week’s broadcasts, the host introduced the featured topic by saying;

“Voters in 6 front-range counties have the rare opportunity to raise their taxes to substantially improve their quality of life. Proceeds for a new bond initiative will fund a $150 million upgrade to Denver’s Lite-Rail System…”

What if other elements of propaganda outreach practiced similarly sounding disclosure?

Thanks for writing a check that exceeds your current account balance. By debiting your account, we’re pleased to provide you the opportunity to make up the difference. Please adjust your spending patterns accordingly. Have a good day!

The Grocery Store

You’ve probably noticed that we’ve increased prices and shrunk contents of all items. No need to strain your back loading groceries. Higher prices and lesser content means fewer bags to carry to the car. We’re counting on you!

The Car Dealer

What better way to improve your patience than have one of our new car “experts” explain the advantages of Sticker Shock in the privacy of his windowless cubicle! Imagine the prestige of owning a car that costs more than your parent’s house!

The Speeding Ticket

NOW, you have a unique way to help the Federal Reserve get rid of old dollar bills. Every year the Fed replaces tired worn out old dollar bills with fresh crisp new currency. Why not help them? Check your wallet or purse every day for old bills. Designate a family member to collect your daily total and mail your old bills to us. We must receive your payment five days prior to your ticket expiration date. For faster service, address your envelope, “Attention: Guido”

The Pre-Approved Credit Card Offer

Congratulations! You’re a Consumer! And what better way to consume than with high interest! That’s right! Use our credit to buy goodies WHEN YOU WANT and pay us the interest.  That way, you get what you want and we get what we want!