Lie-Clocks

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clockwill move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire
life."

"Where's Al Gore's clock?" asked the man.

"Al Gore's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan," St. Peter replied.

"Oh", replied the man, "and where is Howard Dean's clock?".

"That", said St. Peter, "is being used as a turbine to power this whole place".