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You Know You're in a Tough Town When

Hotels ask your name, address and next of kin when you register

Ice cram trucks chimes play 'taps'

Gun shops feature 'Back to School' sales

High school newspapers have obituary columns

Restaurants serve broken leg of lamb

In bowling alleys most people bowl overhand

Schools require a sick note co-signed by your parole officer

Christmas pageants feature the three Wise Guys

A 911 emergency service has a two-day waiting list

Mothers give their kids $5 everyday for the holdup man

College: Forgery 101 and Advanced Counterfeiting are required subjects.

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