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"The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?" Jeremiah 17:9 I have found this true in my life many times. When we acknowledge the pain (ours & that inflicted) & listen for the soft whispers of love that Christ reveals to us, we can hear & know how to deal with our specific issues.
The hardest thing for me as a father was to walk away from my children, even if it was only half (more-like seventy-five percent) of the time. To have another man raise "my" children while I was alive was unthinkable... God Bless