Do Not Touch the Yeti
- Sunday, May 15, 2005
An English explorer was taking part in an expedition to the Himalayas. Led by a grizzled local guide, they ascended one of the less frequently climbed peaks. Roughly halfway up the side of the mountain, a member of the expedition came across a set of large manlike tracks in the snow. "Yeti tracks," the sherpa said with a gruff voice as he passed them. "One thing you must know before we proceed; do not, under any circumstances, touch the yeti."
The expedition heeded his warning and continued to climb the slope. Night fell, and the explorers set up their tents. In the dead of night, the Englishman awoke to the sound of his tent entrance unzipping.
Half-asleep, he looked up to see an enormous eight-foot yeti standing above him.
In fear for his life the explorer jumped up and ran out of the tent, banging into the yeti in the
process. The yeti, after being touched by the explorer let out a deafening howl and began to chase
the explorer down the slope.
The explorer ran away from the camp as quickly as his legs could take him, after he rounded a corner he looked behind him to see the bounding form of the yeti still chasing him.
So the explorer continued to run, reaching the bottom of the mountain in just two days, exhausted he paused to rest awhile. After just a few moments, the explorer began to hear the soft 'thud thud thud' of yeti feet on snow, he looked up the slope to see the yeti still chasing him and only moments away.
The explorer took off again, reaching a supply shack a couple of miles away, once there quickly buying a mountain bike and pedaling his way to the nearest town, some fifty miles away. The journey took him several days over the rough terrain and after his arrival he booked into a hotel to recuperate.
Two days later the man left his hotel to see about booking transport back to England. As soon as he
turned around though he saw the form of the yeti on the horizon, bounding towards him at great speed.
Horrified by this sight, the explorer hurriedly bought a car and drove it away from the village all
the way to Delhi. Once he arrived, the man wasted no time in getting on the next plane to London.
After his arrival back in London, the man went back to his London home for a while to recover and to plan his next expedition. He had been there less than two weeks and was gazing out of a window when he saw a familiar large bounding, manlike creature running down his street; the man couldn't believe it -- somehow the yeti had followed him to England!
The man had little choice but to run away again, he used any means he could, bike, car, or on foot to try to escape the yeti, but each time he looked behind him, it was just moments before the yeti came into view.
Eventually the man made it all the way to Edinburgh and from there ran into the open Scottish countryside. He continued to run but the yeti just kept getting closer and closer, and in the end the man could run no more.
With the yeti less than a minute away from him, the man finally stopped and turned around to face the
oncoming creature. With the last of his strength he stood up straight as the yeti caught up with him. The eight-foot tall yeti towered above the man, who could only stare in terror. The yeti extended his hand and poked the Englishman squarely in the chest with one long finger and in a low rumbling voice the yeti said, "Tag! You're it!"
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