Real Benny Cohen was pulled out of the ocean by a lifeguard. His wife ran over sobbing, "Benny! Benny, what happened?!"

"Madam, please don't get hysterical," said the lifeguard.

"I'm just going to give your husband some artificial respiration and he'll be fine."

"What!" Mrs. Cohen yelled. "My Benny gets either real respiration or nothing."