Then there's the story of the woman who called up the fire department and said, "Look, I've just had a new rock garden built and I've just planted some new roses, and.."

The fireman said, "Where's the fire?"

She said, "I've just spent a lot of money having my lawn mowed and my hedges clipped.  Some of my new plants are very expensive..."

He said, "Look, lady, you don't want the fire department, you want a flower shop."

She said, "No, I don't.  The house next door is on fire, and I don't want you clumsy fireman stamping all over my garden when you come over."