- At a toy store: "Ho, ho, ho spoken here."

- In a bridal boutique: "Marry Christmas."

- Outside a church: "The original Christmas Club."

- At a department store: "Big pre-Christmas sale.  Come in and mangle with the crowd."

- In a Texas jewelry store: "Diamond tiaras: $70,000.  Three for $200,000.

- At a reducing salon: "24 Shaping Days until Christmas."

- In a stationery store: "For the man who has everything: A calendar to remind him when payments are due."