At his wife's insistence, Goldberg finally went to his doctor for a check up.

"You look terrible," said the doctor. "Do you drink?"

"Why yes, plenty." said Goldberg.

"I start every day with a bottle of schnapps."

"And with that cough," the doctor continued, "you probably are a smoker."

"You bet," said Goldberg, "Three packs a day for me."

"Look Mr. Goldberg," the doctor said. "You are not a healthy man. You're going to have to give up smoking and drinking right away, and that's an order. And before you go, that'll be $50 for my advice."

Goldberg replies, "So who's taking it?"