* I don't know what we'll do without you, but we are certainly going to try!  

* We told everyone you are leaving because of illness. The truth is, I'm sick of you.  

* Its not that you aren't a responsible worker. In fact,  you've been responsible for more disasters than any one else in the place.  

* Today I'm going to mix business and pleasure. You're fired!  

* I've got good news for you. You won't have to worry about being late for work 'ever again'.  

* Tell me - how long have you been with us not counting tomorrow?