Don’t Miss it
By: Amanda Idleman
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens… - Ecclesiastes 3:1
We get this life together just once; don’t miss the sweet stuff.
If you are a parent, there is one fact seared into your consciousness: time passes far too quickly. There is just something about watching tiny bodies growing up right in front of your eyes that wakes you up to the reality of our fleeting existence.
For me, this fact sent me into a daily panic during my early years of motherhood. My heart was gripped by the fear that I was going to miss something. As I’ve grown as a mother and as a believer; I’ve just barely begun to understand that the ticking clock is a good thing, because if it wasn’t there reminding us of the passing time, then we’d miss it. We need that pressure to keep our wandering hearts and minds focused.
Our fallen nature wasn’t built for longevity.
In marriage, the years can start to feel long and the distractions many. In contrast to parenting, the changing of seasons in a marriage isn’t nearly as obvious. If we aren’t careful, we can miss the sweet stuff that we get to share with one another.
Did you appreciate what it feels like to be a newlywed? Or did this phase breeze by without your notice? Have you leaned into the middle years, taking delight in the respite you both offer one another, while the daily bustle hums around you both? Are you rejoicing together in the newly gained freedom that becoming empty-nesters brings? Have you paused to savor the slow, purposefulness of your golden years together?
If we are always looking at what comes next in our lives together, we are missing what is now. Now is good. Now is all you definitely have. Now is the time to decide to make the most of loving one another!
Take a moment together and talk with your spouse about what you both love about this season as well as share what’s been challenging. If possible, make this a regular part of your conversation together.
Every Christmas our friends take time to write down what has happened in their lives over the past year. They prayerfully consider where it is that they feel the Lord is leading them next. This record gives them the chance to look back over the years and see the ways God has grown and provided for them. What a faith booster! Just this simple act of reflection helps them to stay purpose-filled and engaged in their marriage.
Daily sharing with your spouse one way you are thankful for them is another way to help you both not miss out on the sweetness of the now.
Special getaways with each other are another way to keep the spark alive. This could look like an unplanned date night, movies and popcorn at home once the kids go to bed, or even a vacation you take- just the two of you!
In order to truly see each other, we have to commit to spending time together, away from all the noise our lives have.
One of my favorite ways to dial into the now and all the good that my husband brings to my life is to think back to the beginning. I pile all the memories into my mind, from the sweet naive start till the crazy loud now. When I take this view, I am able to appreciate the sweet, sweet story that God is writing with our lives together.
We have our ugly moments but that’s not the main attraction. When I think of it all (at least all that I’m able to recall); it’s then I see how blessed I am. I know with all my heart God will bring us through whatever season comes next because He has been so very faithful to us. I am so grateful for the now because as the memories stack up the richness of love we have grows.
Amanda Idleman is a writer whose passion is to encourage others to live joyfully. She writes about all things motherhood for Richmond Macaroni Kid, creates devotions for Daily Bible Devotions App, she has work published with Her View from Home, and is a regular contributor for the marriage/family/homeschool/parenting channels on Crosswalk.com. You can find out more about Amanda at rvahouseofjoy.com or follow her on Instagram at rvahouseofjoy.
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