Fearing Your Marriage Will End in Divorce - Crosswalk Couples Devotional - July 14
Fearing Your Marriage Will End in Divorce
By: Vivian Bricker
“I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.” (Psalm 34:4)
It is common for a husband or a wife to fear their marriage will end in divorce. Knowing this is a common concern doesn’t make it any less scary. Sadly, many marriages end in divorce, but this doesn’t mean yours will. If you are feeling anxious about your marriage, it might be best to sit down and talk with your spouse. Share your worries, concerns, and feelings with them.
If you’ve both been at odds and it’s more than just a passing worry, take time to sit down and talk things over. Christian marriage counseling is something you should consider, as it can help repair damaged relationships. Even if nothing major is happening right now, it can work as a preventive measure and help your marriage grow.
Nonetheless, if you are worried that your marriage will end in divorce, I want you to ask yourself these questions:
-Why am I afraid?
-Is there any proof for my fear?
-Is my fear rooted in insecurities or facts?
-Does my spouse know about this fear?
-What will I do if my marriage does end in divorce?
All of these questions are worth answering as they will help you gauge your next steps. If you are afraid of your marriage ending in divorce because you were unfaithful to your spouse or they were unfaithful to you, then this is a valid reason for thinking this way. However, if you are fearful just because it is a thought that passes your mind due to anxiety, then it is nothing to worry about.
If you have proof for your fear, it could worsen these thoughts; however, if you don’t have any, it could be extremely beneficial. Finding the root of the fear can help discern if the fear is something to actually consider. You should still talk to your spouse about all of these fears and worries, but it is helpful to think over these issues ahead of time. It can give you peace of mind in the interim.
Once you talk with your spouse about this fear, all of your fears could be diminished. If they are not and your spouse is in agreement that your marriage is on the rocks, it is time to reach out to a Christian marriage counselor. God wants you and your spouse to stay married as long as there is no abuse or infidelity. If neither of these things has happened, you should both work through any issues to stay together.
Even in matters of infidelity, many couples can still work through them. While it will be hard, it is possible if both the husband and the wife want the marriage to be repaired. Therefore, whether the fear is rooted in anxiety or solid proof, it is important to talk matters over with God and your spouse. Pray to God before you speak with your spouse, and continue to ask God to speak life into your marriage.
The Bible says, “I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears” (Psalm 34:4). Bring all your worries, concerns, and fears to the Lord. Give them over to Him, and He will deliver you from all your fears. Just as the Lord brought David deliverance from his fears, He will also bring hope, comfort, and peace into your heart. No matter what happens in your marriage, know you can bring all your fears to Him, and He will cover you with His grace.
It is also important to note that even if your marriage does end in divorce, it is not the end of the world. While it can be painful, it will not destroy you. Marriage is a beautiful blessing for many people, but you can still live and serve the Lord regardless of your marital status. The end of a marriage is not the end of your story. Trust God with the pain and know He is always there for you (Romans 8:31).
“Dear God, I’m often terrified that my spouse will leave me and our marriage will end in divorce. Please help this fear go away and help me find peace in You. Equip my spouse and me with the kindness, support, and love we need to work through any issues in our marriage. Lastly, even if this does mean the end of our marriage, help me to find comfort in You. Amen.”
Related Resource: 3 Simple Ways to Feed Your Spouse More Praise
How often do you intentionally stop to praise your spouse? To recognize and affirm their character or actions? Many of us probably cringe at answering these questions because we know we could do better! If you struggle to feed your spouse praise regularly, this episode is for you. Listen in as we share some practical steps we all can take to criticize less and affirm and build up our spouse more. If this episode helps your marriage, be sure to subscribe to Team Us on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode.
