When It’s Time to Call an Audible
By Andy Allan
One strategic adjustment could salvage a losing situation.
Approaching a crucial third down, Peyton Manning notices a weakness in the defense’s position, sprints up to his line, and shouts “O-maha, oma-HA!”
With an NBA championship on the line, Phil Jackson calls a timeout, leans toward his star, and asks, “Michael, who’s open?”
In the middle of an argument with your spouse, you stop mid-sentence, take a deep breath, and push out the words, “I’m sorry. I don’t want to have this same fight over and over. Let’s try something different.”
Sometimes, our “go-to plays” just don’t work anymore. What then? You call an audible (for you non-sports fans, that’s a last-second change in the play).
Need a little help with your own marriage strategy? Here are three strategic shifts to get you thinking outside the box.
1. Call a timeout.
In the middle of a fight with my wife, she’ll often try and press pause, asking for space. “No way!” I used to retort. “We’re finishing this now!” I’ve finally realized taking a minute to cool down can help me see clearly and adjust my
2. Ask for feedback.
Soliciting feedback can tell you which tactics are still going strong, and which need to be retired. Try something simple: “I was thinking of trying something new to connect this month, how does that sound?” Or “Are you satisfied with the way we handle conflict?
3. Run the option.
Successful quarterbacks read their options: multiple receivers running unique routes to increase the odds that someone’s open.
If date night falls through because my spouse is sick, does that ruin our ability to connect? To love our spouses effectively, it’s crucial to create multiple paths to success.
Trying something new can feel risky. With risk comes reward, though—more intimacy, more joy. Courageously adjusting our marriage strategies could take your relationship to the next level.
The Good Stuff: The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. (Proverbs 16:9)
Action points: Which one of the above points would make the greatest difference in your marriage today? Take a look at your typical marriage plays and commit to make one adjustment today.
Visit the FamilyLife® Website