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The Genius Who Missed the Mystery - I Do Every Day - February 3, 2021

  • 2021 Feb 03

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The Genius Who Missed the Mystery
By Sabrina McDonald

My husband and I watched a dramatized mini-series about Einstein a while back. One theme focused on his love life.

Suffice it to say, Einstein wasn’t the most faithful husband.

When asked about his affairs by one of the show’s characters, Einstein said he loved his wife very much, but he also loved his mistress. “There is no measure of love,” he said. “I love both Bach and Mozart. I don’t have to choose one over the other.”

Funny, I’ve said the same thing about being a remarried widow. I love my current husband, but I also love my deceased husband, just as I love both of my children. I agree with Einstein on that point—there is no limit to love, is there?

So, why should it be wrong for him to love two women at once?

The answer is easy, really. It’s because marriage isn’t just about love. Marriage is also about commitment, friendship, loyalty, stability, and a host of other foundational matters. It goes far beyond moods of “love.”

Our romance-obsessed culture has reduced marriage to a feeling—a string, if you will, between two people. Affection. That’s a woefully underrated definition.

If love is a string, marriage is an intricately woven blanket of strings that includes feelings, shared experiences, secrets, memories, building up, tearing down, sacrifice, dependence. It is both complicated and beautiful—a work of art.

Having each lost our former spouses and fulfilled our “till death” promises, my husband and I understand what it really means to love two people.

We mourned the ignorance of a man who was genius in so many other ways. What a shame he took “relativity” into his marriage and missed one of the true mysteries of the universe.

Read more on faithfulness in marriage in “I’m Not Going Anywhere.”

The good stuff: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:31-32)

Action points: How is your marriage based on more than just feelings of “love”? If the word “love” did not exist in our language, how would you express the connection between you and your spouse?

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