New Year’s Anti-Resolutions
By Lisa Lakey
For years, I made New Year’s resolutions. And for years, I failed to follow through on any of them past January 31.
One year, my resolutions were to drop 20 pounds, read through the entire Bible with a daily reading plan, and to complete a couples devotional with my husband. All good things, right? Now let me tell you about reality.
Hours after stating those lofty goals, our youngest wandered out of his room with a stuffed puppy and an earache. The rest of the night was spent consuming leftover Christmas candy as he slept upright on my chest. (Side note: I gained five pounds that year.) By the end of the month, I had replaced the Christmas candy with Valentine’s Day sweets, we made it to the second page of the devotional, and I was two weeks behind on my reading plan.
The following year, the shame of failing didn’t make it any easier to follow through with the next round of resolutions.
It’s not that I don’t want to better myself—I do. But instead of giving myself a list of goals to be a better me, be a better wife, have a better marriage this year, I’m focusing on what we did right, instead of a list of things we need to be better at. I’m calling these “anti-resolutions.”
Here’s my list:
- Most of our meals this year were spent together at the dinner table.
- We tag-teamed like champs when one kid had a string of injuries that threw our calendar into chaos.
- We made a solid attempt at family devotions.
- We snuck away for lunch more during the week.
- We had some hard conversations about our relationship and managed to act like mature adults.
- We practiced forgiveness and grace when we didn’t want to.
Next year? I don’t know what it will bring. But I hope at the end of the year, we’ll be celebrating the good rather than focusing on unmet goals.
The good stuff: Let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice! Seek the LORD and his strength … Remember the wondrous works that he has done. (1 Chronicles 16:10-12)
Actions points: Tonight, instead of making a list of to-dos, list the ways you’ve seen God moving in your marriage this last year, memories that were made, and even ways you overcame hard situations together.
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