Two Bucks Worth of Commitment, Please
By Lisa Lakey
My husband and I love bargain hunting at flea markets, antique stores, even our local Goodwill. But our approaches to purchasing an item are completely different.
The price tag is part of my purchase decision. But my husband sees it as the base point for negotiations.
One day, we came across an old, chipped wooden headboard. I wondered if the price reflected the sanding, painting, and sweat it would take to fix it up. Then my husband walked to the counter and offered the manager $2.
“If we end up just storing it in the garage, at least we didn’t pay much,” he said.
I was shocked and a bit embarrassed. But I was more shocked when the manager said, “Go for it.”
I can’t help but see a metaphor there.
It’s tempting in marriage to settle for two bucks worth of commitment. We’ll take it as-is, but we aren’t sure we’re ready to slog through what it takes to make it better. Maybe we even think we can scrap it if the work’s too hard.
I’ve often given just enough to get us to a comfortable place, but don’t seem willing to put the elbow grease in to make our marriage all it could be.
Jesus showed us the real definition of commitment when He answered the rich man’s question of how he could have eternal life (Luke 18:18-23). Jesus’ answer was simple—leave your stuff behind and “come, follow Me.” I don’t think that rich man was a bargain shopper, because he didn’t like that answer.
But our best example of a loving, committed relationship is how Jesus lived on earth: living, loving, healing, forgiving, and sacrificing. All for fixer-uppers like us.
I’m not saying it’s easy. Far from it. But giving my husband more than two bucks of commitment lets him know I’m in it for the long haul. No matter the mutual elbow grease.
The good stuff: [Jesus] did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, by taking the form of a servant … and being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death. (Philippians 2: 6-8)
Action points: How can you show your spouse you’re in this for the long game? Could it mean never mentioning divorce as an option? Voicing your commitment when your spouse has blown it? Forming Plan B for your future together when Plan A implodes? Remember, actions speak louder than words.
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