I think it’s your fault
Confession: When someone calls me on something—whether I actually did it or not—my first inclination is to blame the socks off someone else.
My heart reacts with something like, Quick! Hide!
I find great, if temporary, comfort in being defensive. It’s like the comedy of errors in Eden: The woman you gave me, Lord! She did it!
(What Adam was really saying? “It was You, God.”)
As if I needed it, author Paul David Tripp similarly points out that yes, I’m indirectly blaming God. “You are essentially saying: ‘My problem isn’t a heart problem; my problem is a poverty of grace problem. If only God had given me ____, I wouldn’t have had to do what I did ...’”*
Usually, I want to blame my reactions on my children’s terrible attitudes. The dog pooping on the floor. My husband saying something tersely. But maybe it’s like our mothers told us: You can’t control someone else’s action, but you can control your reaction.
And that reaction is, in all honesty, my own heart problem. When I’m pointing the finger, I’m abdicating my own capacity to change—to surrender and die all over again to myself.
What if I could take 100% responsibility for my contribution, even if it’s only 2% of the problem?
Read more on avoiding the “blame game” trap.
The good stuff: I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)
Action points: The next time you seek to blame, look for the log in your own eye (Matthew 7:5). For what can you take full responsibility, choosing to be crucified with Christ?
*New Morning Mercies: A Daily Gospel Devotional. Crossway: Wheaton, IL (2014). Kindle Edition.
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