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Real Life Stinks. But That’s Good - I Do Every Day - September 5

  • 2020 Sep 05

Real Life Stinks. But That’s Good
By Lisa Lakey

My wedding took months to plan, people. So many details: dress, bridesmaids and groomsmen, venue, food, flowers, invitations.

And yet my wedding day culminated within roughly 30 minutes. A swapping of rings, vows made in front of loved ones, and boom—we were married. Headed into the great unknown together from this day forward.

But donning a white dress and slapping a tiara on my head prepared me for zilch. The easy stuff rarely needs preparation for.

What do you do when your spouse gets a promotion? Cheer! Buy a new home? Celebrate! Two pink lines on a pregnancy test? Rejoice!

But what about the hard stuff that undoubtedly knocks on your door?

My husband and I have twice spent months on our knees praying over a sick child. Three times we’ve shouldered one another’s job loss side by side. And then there were the things not beyond our control—bitter words, heartache, and arguments on repeat. Things that made tiaras and uttering “for better or for worse” seem like lifetimes ago.

I’m not bashing weddings. In fact, I love ‘em. The celebration of two lives joining is hopefully just the beginning of many joyous moments to come. But as you already know, weddings are just that … beginnings. Not the end goal.

A friend once told me, “In marriage, you get through the hard stuff to get to the really good stuff.”

The real celebration comes from victory over defeat. From “winning” through losses, sharing the pain of real life, and overcoming life’s dodgeballs together. That’s where the “really good stuff” begins.

You’ll often get it wrong in marriage. For more, read “Giving Your Spouse the Freedom to Fail.”

The good stuff: Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready. (Revelation 19:7)

Action points: They say what doesn’t kill us only makes us stronger. Not the most optimistic line, but where in your marriage have you seen this to be true? Maybe that job loss finally got you on the same page financially. Those years of sickness that increased your faith exponentially. Pray with your spouse today. Thank God for both the hills and valleys He’s brought you through together.

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