Your Pastor Needs Encouragement – Here Are 7 Ways You Can Help

Clarence L. Haynes Jr. Contributing Writer
Published Jan 06, 2023

Being a pastor is a challenging and sometimes thankless job. According to a Barna research group survey from March 2022, 42 percent of pastors have considered quitting full-time ministry within the last year. If you are paying attention, that represents almost half of the pastors who are working.

Think about your church for a moment. It’s possible almost half of the pastors there have thought about quitting the ministry. This is an astounding number. One of my friends is stepping away from full-time ministry as a pastor and when I asked him if he was interested in pastoring again, he said “not anytime soon.” While this may seem like an indictment on the job, that is only part of the story. Pastors are not just frustrated with the job of pastoring, but also with the people they are called to serve. This is one area within your control where you can make your pastor’s job more enjoyable.

Why Are Pastors Ready to Quit Full-Time Ministry?

Here is a statement from the Barna study, highlighting the top three reasons pastors considered quitting.

“Over half of pastors who have considered quitting full-time ministry (56%) say “the immense stress of the job” has factored into their thoughts on leaving. Beyond these general stressors, two in five pastors (43%) say “I feel lonely and isolated,” while 38 percent name “current political divisions” as reasons they’ve considered stepping away.”

Stress, loneliness, isolation, and political division. These are issues that you, as the congregant, can play a role in helping to overcome. Some of the other reasons included:

- I am unhappy with the effect this role has had on my family

- I am not optimistic about the future of my church

- My vision for the church conflicts with the church’s direction

- I am not satisfied with my job

- I don’t feel respected by the congregants

- I don’t feel equipped to cope with ministry demands

Regardless of how you shape it, our pastors – and possibly your pastor – are in a challenging place. If you believe pastors are important to the growth, development, and continuation of the local church, then we need to think of solutions to help encourage pastors to stay instead of helping push them out the door.

7 Things You Can Do to Make Your Pastor’s Job More Enjoyable

1. Pray for Them

The easiest thing in the world to do is complain about the pastor, but what do you do after that? When was the last time you sincerely prayed for your pastor? I am not talking about the type of prayers that begin with “O God, let them see things the way I see them.” How about praying for their needs and their issues? If the stress of being a pastor is making them want to quit, this means your pastor could think of quitting. If they are, they need grace to endure. Why not incorporate that into your prayers for your pastor? Pray for God to give them grace to lead, courage to make tough decisions, the ability to endure, and the heart to follow God’s will.

2. Ask Them How They Are Doing

Most people who criticize pastors have never been one. The Barna study highlighted that being a pastor can be lonely and isolating. Many pastors hesitate to tell people what they do for a living when they are outside of church because the mood always shifts when people know what they do. Just think how this is for a conversation starter. What do you do for a living? I’m a pastor. Those words can easily make people feel uncomfortable.

Also, many congregants think the pastor has everything buttoned up and their lives have no issues. Neither of these things is true. The burden of caring for and leading others is heavy, so from time to time, take a moment and ask the pastor how they are doing. Sometimes we forget the emotional toll that comes when you must lead people, especially because there are some who are difficult to lead. If you have time, invite the pastor out for coffee or lunch and just ask them how they are doing. There may be things they are unwilling to share, but the gesture will tell them you care about their life as much as they care about yours.

3. Be Easy to Work With

No one enjoys working with troublesome people. This is not just true of pastors; this is true of everyone. Someone told me this a while ago and I strive to live by this rule – be easy to work with. One of the best ways to make your pastor’s job more enjoyable is by not adding a burden to them. It is hard enough finding volunteers to help in the church. The last thing they need is a volunteer who is intolerable to work with. If there is a need and you can help, then do it. Don’t do it with grumbling or complaining, but with kindness in your heart. Trust me, they will appreciate it, and it can be one less thing they need to worry about.

4. Allow Them to Be Human

If you are not aware of this yet, pastors are not superhuman. They don’t wear capes. They can’t leap buildings in a single bound. They cannot walk on water, neither can they change water into wine. Pastors are human servants called to a supernatural work. The same way you need grace every day to do your job, they do too. Their humanity means they get nervous, tired, fearful, even unsure. This also means they can make mistakes or even have a wrong opinion. Their title does not make them immune to this, so give grace that allows room for their humanity because, trust me, they need it.

5. Leave the Politics Home

One of the biggest reasons pastors want to step away is because of political division. When did the job description of being a pastor include becoming a political advocate? I didn’t realize there was a Democrat or Republican box that needed to be checked on the job application. If there is one way you can make the job of your pastor more enjoyable, it is by leaving the political stuff at home. The job of your pastor is not to be your political advocate, nor your political adversary, so don’t expect them to be. Most pastors I know are not interested in bringing politics into the pulpit. This does not mean they don’t have political opinions, but because they care about all the sheep, not just the ones who may share their political viewpoint, they don’t express them from the pulpit (or at least they shouldn’t).

6. Respect Their Time

One of the other issues is the effect the role of pastor has on their family. A friend of mine was a pastor’s kid (PK) and she told me how she resented the church because it demanded so much of her father’s time. When her father could not be available because of a family obligation, many of the members would get upset. This would lead to gossipy, negative conversations about the pastor. My friend heard some things that were said, and the harsh words of people wounded her. For the people, they were talking about the pastor. For her, they were talking about her daddy.

Please remember, not only are pastor’s human, but they have families and feelings too. The pastor has an obligation to his family just like you do, and we should acknowledge that. Let me say it even more clearly: Pastors have a life outside of church and we should let them enjoy it. This means there may be moments where they are not available to you because they are spending time with family, on vacation, or just getting much needed rest. That is perfectly normal and welcomed behavior. We should respect their time off. After all, we want them to respect ours.

7. Be an Encourager

Remember some words used in the survey. Stressed, lonely, isolated, unhappy, not optimistic, unsatisfied, not respected, not equipped. These are the emotions of a person who needs a word of encouragement. You can be the person who gives it to them. The pastor may have done some things wrong, but they have also done some things right. Instead of harping on the wrong stuff all the time, which is what most do, find one thing they did right and encourage them in that. Most congregants don’t do this. Remember, this is an emotional, lonely job, so words of encouragement matter and are sorely needed.

You Play a Big Role in Making the Pastor’s Job More Enjoyable

The members of the church play a big role in why pastors want to quit the ministry. For those who feel the call to be a pastor and commit themselves to seeing it through, we have an obligation to do everything we can to help them finish what God has called them to do. The job of pastor is hard enough, let’s not add any more weight to what they are already carrying. We can make the demanding job of being a pastor more enjoyable. This is not just something we can do, it is something we should do. Who knows, maybe we can encourage one more pastor not to quit the ministry, and that could be a blessing to many people’s lives.

Clarence L. Haynes Jr. is a speaker, Bible teacher, and co-founder of The Bible Study Club. He is the author of The Pursuit of Purpose which will help you understand how God leads you into his will. His most recent book is The Pursuit of Victory: How To Conquer Your Greatest Challenges and Win In Your Christian Life. This book will teach you how to put the pieces together so you can live a victorious Christian life and finally become the man or woman of God that you truly desire to be. Clarence is also committed to helping 10,000 people learn how to study the Bible and has just released his first Bible study course called Bible Study Basics. To learn more about his ministry please visit clarencehaynes.com.