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Calm Before the Storm

  • Dr. Gary and Barbara Rosberg America's Family Coaches
  • Published Jan 28, 2004
Calm Before the Storm

Dr. Gary Rosberg Speaks to Men

Anyone who lives on a coastline prone to hurricanes knows that the time to shop for shutters, clean drinking water, and obtain more home insurance passes once the storm arrives! While all of these preparations make sense, they are easy to put off because killer storms don't strike everyday.

When it comes to marriage, all of us live in a hurricane zone at times. And because marital storms seldom come with a warning, it's during the calm stretches of life that we must get ready.

Are you doing today what it takes to face life's trials? Are you building a relationship now that will be ready for the tests you can't anticipate?

If you are anything like Barb and me, you live in a pressure cooker world. Whether you have growing kids, aging parents, busy work situations or all three, life can feel like a three ring circus. Each of these priorities are great privileges but they are guaranteed to add stress to your life!

What we need is a way of loving each other that provides strength to withstand life's pain. When we offer each other an enduring love, we stick around for suffering, walk through pain, and stay devoted through difficult times.

An enduring love provides us companionship, gratefulness, and fire-tested loyalty. We obtain the assurance that we aren't alone and we have the privilege of walking through tough times with our best friend!

Men, now more than ever, we need to make sure our families are secure. Take the extra time to make those initial preparations so when storms hit, you have a solid foundation to stand on!

Remember, it is our duty, honor, and God-given responsibility to ensure our family's safety. I know I'm doing all I can to prepare for the storms that will enter our life. Are you willing to do the same?

Dr. Barbara Rosberg speaks to women

Like every married couple, Gary and I have had our share of normal ups and downs: illnesses, job pressures, times we ignored each other's needs. But through it all, we've been committed to facing these ups and downs together-as a team, partners, best friends in the whirlwind of life.

A little over four years ago, Gary's dad died. We felt as if life crashed into us like the iceberg hitting the Titanic. It was a tremendous time of grief and loss. While Gary tried to press on, over time it became clear he had entered a deep depression. Gary had always been a lighthouse to me and suddenly the light had grown dim. I didn't know if his heart would ever light again or if this storm would end.

During this tough time, my determination was to stand by my husband. The wedding vows we spoke to each other over 28 years ago still rang loud and true. But through it all, I knew our only security during this time was a reliance on God and a willingness to walk in His ways.

Many months later, after daily perseverance, the bright sun broke through the storm clouds in our life. One day, Gary burst through the back door with a smile on his face and a renewed joy in his heart. God had led him to Exodus 14:13 where it says, "Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today." I was excited to have my man back!

Over the years, Gary and I have learned with every trial there is a beginning, middle, and an end. With the help of God, we have found our way through dangerous passages and withstood many trials. And through each one, we came out the other side with greater determination, devotion, and a deeper love because we took the precarious journey together!

Stand firm together as one. I am often reminded that the only eternal things in life are God and people. So when you're walking through the tough storms of life, remember to endure together, comfort, and pray for one another. Knowing that through it all you'll come out stronger and bonded closer together.

Portions of this article were adapted from The 5 Love Needs of Men & Women, Copyright 2000 by Dr. Gary and Barbara Rosberg, all rights reserved. Published by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., To order this resource or to find our more about America's Family Coaches, visit or call 1-888-ROSBERG. For more information about the Divorce-Proofing America's Marriages campaign logon to

© 2003 America's Family Coaches

Married 28 years, the parents of two adult daughters and one grandson, Dr. Gary and Barbara Rosberg have a unique blend of insight and wisdom that touch people of all ages. Together with Gary's 25,000 hours of counseling experience and Barbara's gift of encouragement and biblical teaching, they are America's Family Coaches, equipping thousands of families across the nation through their interactive daily radio program, conferences, and marriage and family resources.