1. Give Him Healing Words
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Do you remember how you talked to your husband when the two of you first fell in love? Instead of waiting for him to talk to you that way again, be the initiator and re-start that loving habit.
You have the ability to light up your spouse more than anyone else. Your compliments and praise can go further than anyone else’s. Your pride in him is far more important to him than his mother’s or his boss’s or even his children’s.
He really wants to know what you think of him and loves to hear you bragging to others about how attractive (or kind, or talented or wise) he is. Your kind, affirming words can even help soothe over a wound he may have experienced years ago from damaging words that cut into his heart and soul and shaped who he believes he is today.
When you talk up your husband, you are building him up and lighting him up. You may also be healing some parts in his or her heart that have started to close off.
Practice Ephesians 4:29 daily and “Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them” (NLT).
2. Keep Realistic Expectations
Every wife has expectations when she marries. And then later she either raises them, refuses to lower them, or loses them altogether.
But when you keep in mind your husband is a man, not God, he has his faults like you, and he operates well after being fed and having time to relax, you won’t be as disappointed.
I know you don’t consciously expect your husband to be God, but we all look to someone or something to fill us, calm us, and comfort us. When we expect our husbands to come through for us like God would, they will disappoint us every time. And no husband wants to disappoint his wife.
So, don’t set him up for failure. Keep yourself in check, emotionally, by asking yourself often “Who is the one I am ultimately depending on?” If the answer to that question is anyone other than God (yourself included!), confess your misaligned priorities and invite God back onto the throne of your life.
Give your husband emotional space by looking to God to be your spiritual husband (Isaiah 54:5). It’s a way of saying, “I love you, but I’m not expecting you to be God.”
By keeping realistic expectations of your husband and letting God meet your emotional needs, you are giving your husband a gift that will make him feel special.
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