The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
— Genesis 2:18
Carmen’s first Christmas as a single mother was incredibly difficult. Happy couples were everywhere – at church, shopping malls, and every party she attended. As the holidays loomed ever nearer, with increasing dread she faced the thought of being alone.
Carmen’s struggle with loneliness isn’t uncommon for single people.
Singles know Genesis 2:18 well, don’t we? We read it, nod our heads in agreement, and ask, “Where is my helper?” and “If it is not good for man to be alone, then why am I?” However, Adam’s situation was different from our own because he was the only human being on the planet at the time. He was literally alone.
That’s not something that we have to experience today. The world is full of people who want contact with others. Sometimes singles think that the only way we can overcome loneliness is to find a spouse. Instead, we should realize that people all around us are seeking connection with someone. While it is certainly possible to feel alone in a crowd, we wouldn’t if we were more willing to turn to someone in the crowd and interact.
Churches and many civic groups offer chances to interact with people. Every church I’ve ever been involved with offers Bible studies and fellowship opportunities. Hospitals, nursing homes, and prisons are full of people who would love to have someone to talk to on a regular basis.
Here’s what Carmen did: “My solution was to reach out to other single-parent families and invite them to my home for an open house. Families were invited to stop by between one and five o’clock on Christmas Day and bring something to share. What a great day! People came early and stayed late.”
Carmen didn’t wait to find a community; she created one.
Digging Deeper into Genesis 2:18
1. List two or three groups or organizations you’ve considered joining.
2. How often do you initiate conversations with strangers?
3. What barriers do you experience to starting a conversation?
4. Next time you are at a mall or party or anywhere that brings people together, watch how people interact. Find one person who seems relaxed talking with strangers and identify the things he or she says.
5. Name one thing you can do to meet your need for community that would also meet the needs of other singles for community.
Used by permission of Fleming H. Revell, a division of Baker Publishing Group, copyright © 2005. All rights to this material are reserved. Materials are not to be distributed to other web locations for retrieval, published in other media, or mirrored at other sites without written permission from Baker Publishing Group.
Lee Warren has been the singles columnist for Christianity Online and has also written articles for Decision, Victory, Light and Life, Cross and Quill and Live Wire.