You Drive, I'll Nag-ivate
By Jim Mitchell
Yep. She actually said it to me on a road trip.
“You drive, I’ll nag-ivate.”
She meant “navigate,” of course, but the Freudian slip stuck its landing. We’ve laughed about it ever since.
And honestly, she sometimes does “nag-ivate” rather than navigate. She means no harm. She just wants to help and hates wasting time. But that’s not how it comes across.
Nothing feels worse as the driver than taking a wrong turn and having your spouse immediately comment on it. No matter what words she uses, all you hear is, “Hey stupid, you took a wrong turn. I noticed.” Maybe it comes with a subtitle for easy translation: You are incompetent.
Again, that’s not what’s in her heart. But it is what lands in yours.
Conversely, nothing feels better after taking a wrong turn than hearing ... nothing. You actually have breathing room to find your way back on track.
Oh, you’re certain she noticed the wrong turn. And she may very well be biting her tongue hard over there.
But the patient silence speaks volumes: “I’m just thankful you’re keeping us safe. You’re doing a great job. I trust you.”
Wrong turns are inevitable. But giving your spouse a little room for error can make the trip more enjoyable for both of you. That’s helpful navigation.
The good stuff: Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.(Proverbs 19:11)
Action points: The next time you notice your spouse doing something stupid, don’t. Don’t notice. Overlook it and give space for course correction you don’t control.
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