Fat Cow!
Published May 12, 2003
A bloke was about to bring his new girlfriend home, so he warned his parrot not to say any offensive remarks; the parrot had a tendency to verbally abuse anyone who came into the house. The next night the guy walked in with his new girlfriend, and the parrot instantly began to insult her: "Who's a fat cow, then? Who's been hit by a truck, then?"
The next day the infuriated man decided to shove the parrot in the freezer to teach it a lesson.
About two minutes later the parrot calls out, "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I'm really, really sorry." The man feels a bit guilty and decides to let the parrot back out.
For the next couple of months he doesn't hear so much as a squeak out of the parrot. He can't believe how successful his freezer trick turned out to be.
But finally one night the parrot got up enough courage to talk again. "Excuse me, please," the parrot said very cautiously, "but what exactly did the chicken do?"
Originally published May 13, 2003.
