The Truth About Cats - another version

Dogs come when they're called; Cats take a message and get back to you later.

Cats don't like being baptized.

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

A cat is always on the wrong side of the door.

A cat will always sit on whatever you're trying to read.

A cat's purr: The most effective stress medicine known.

Cats are quite good at domesticating humans.

Anything not nailed down is a cat toy.

Cats know Mom's black suede gloves are giant tarantulas that need to be killed.

Cats must attack their human's shoelaces when they are tying them.

Cats must crawl into the dishwasher when it is full of clean dishes.

It's always darkest before you step on the cat.

Cats must rub against your legs while you're carrying two bags of grocieries.