You know your dog owns YOU because......
Published Jan 01, 1900
You stopped at a house with a "Free Puppies" sign in the yard to have an Educational "Chat" about neutering, and your kids had to post your bail.
You have a bumper sticker that reads:
"My Basset Hound Is Smarter Than Your Graduate Student."
You absentmindedly pat people on the head or scratch them behind their ears.
You've forwarded more warnings about the dangers of chocolate, onions and mistletoe than the National Center for Disease Control has issued about anthrax and smallpox.
You tell your children to "heel!" in a grocery store.
You spend eleven months of the year preaching an appreciation and understanding of canine behavior and the nature of the dog, then you stick fake reindeer antlers on the dog and photograph him for your Christmas Card.
Originally published November 14, 2002.
