My Housework Philosophy

I don't do windows because I love birds and don't want one to run into a clean window and get hurt.
I don't wax floors because I am terrified a guest will slip, hurt themselves, I'll feel terrible and they may sue me.
I don't mind the dust bunnies because they are very good company, I have named most of them, and they agree with everything I say.
I don't disturb cobwebs because I want every creature to have a home of their own.
I don't Spring Clean because I love all the seasons and don't want the others to get jealous.
I don't pull weeds in the garden because I don't want to get rid of the only green I got.
I don't put things away because my husband will never be able to find them again.
I don't do gourmet meals when I entertain because I don't want my guests to stress out over what to make when they invite me over for dinner.
I don't iron because I choose to believe them when they say "Permanent Press."
I don't stress much on anything because "A Type" personalities die young and I want to stick around and become a wrinkled up crusty ol' person!
Originally published August 09, 2005.