- It is well documented that for every mile that you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5,000 per month.
- My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She is now 97 and we don't know where she is.
- I joined a health club last year, spent about $400. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
- I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I am doing.
- I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes , he would have put them further up our body.
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
- I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
- The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
- If you are going to try cross country skiing, start with a small country.
- And last, but not least, I don't jog - it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.
Originally published November 14, 2002.
