Fractured Christmas Carols

No one can fracture a Christmas carol better than a kid. Sing along with these new takes on old favorites:

Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly
We three kings of porridge and tar
On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me
Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire.
He's makin a list, chicken and rice.
Noel. Noel, Barney's the king of Israel.
With the jelly toast proclaim
Olive, the other reindeer.
Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say
Sleep in heavenly peas
In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown
You'll go down in Listerine
Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay
O come, froggy faithful
You'll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require"
Good tidings we bring to you and your kid

And then there is this….

A class of 5-year-olds was singing Christmas carols, with each child naming favorite carols for the class to sing.

In a corner of the room, at a Nativity scene a little girl name Ava was toying with a shepherd figurine. The teacher asked Ava to name her favorite Christmas carol. Without hesitation she replied, "While Shepherds Washed Their Socks by Night."

Originally published November 14, 2002.