"One for you , One for me....."
The huge nut tree by the fence of the town cemetery was always laden with the most delicious stuff, but nobody ever picked them. Not until the day when two young boys went a-nut-picking that is. They filled up a bucketful of nuts and seated themselves comfortably by the root of the huge tree, safely out of sight from anybody outside the cemetery, and began the process of dividing the collection evenly amongst themselves.
v "One for you, one for me.... One for you, one for me..." went one of them as he divided the nuts one by one. The bucket was so full that as he pulled out a nut, several specimens would roll out towards the fence, but there were so many to go that the boys didn't mind..
Cycling down the road by the cemetery was this young fella on his newly-acquired bike. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery, and slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he did hear a voice "One for you, One for me.... One for you,....." but could not trace where it was coming from. Then suddenly, he realized what it was. "Oh my God!" he shuddered, "It's Satan and St. Peter dividing the souls at the cemetery! I must find someone else to listen to this, otherwise no one else would believe me."..
So he cycled down the road a bit, and to his relief there was an old man with a walking stick, hobbling his way towards the town..
"Sir, sir, come quickly please. " he said, "You won't believe what I heard. Satan and St. Peter are down at the cemetery dividing the souls. I heard them myself - come with me, I'll show you"..
v "Shoo off ya young brat you! Ya know no end of ya silly practical jokes, you do." the man said. "Having the nerve to ask me to walk back all the way to the cemetery - Can't ya see I'm finding it difficult to walk as it is! Now shoo off before I whack ya one with my walking stick! Young folk my day treated elders with respect, you hear me, RESPECT!".
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However, after several belated pleas, the young fellow finally talked the old man into hobbling his way back to the cemetery, and sure enough, they heard the mysterious voice from somewhere inside, "One for you, one for me... One for you, one...." "Egad, laddie! You's been speakin' the truth all this time." whispered the old man. "Let's see if we can catch a glimpse of the Devil himself.".
v Shivering with fear, he edged toward the cemetery fence along with the young lad. Peeking in from just outside the fence, they still couldn't see anything, but sure enough, still heard - "One for you, one for me.... One for you, one for me.... And one last one for you. There, that's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done.".
Originally published November 14, 2002.
