Small Town America

He got this reply:

Dear New York Person :

I am the postmaster of this village and received your letter. I am also an honest lawyer and ordinarily would be pleased to accept a case against a local debtor. In this case, however, I also happen to be the person you sold those crummy goods to. I received your demand to pay and refused to honor it. I am also the banker you sent the draft to draw on our local merchant, and I sent that back with a note stating that the merchant will never pay. My brother, the sheriff suggested that you visit our town personnaly to collect what you think I owe you. And if I were not, for the time being, substituting for the pastor of our local church, I would tell you in plain language just what I thought of your claim.

If I can be of any further help in collecting your claim against me kindly forward a $5,000 non-refundable legal retainer.