The Ice Machine

Jill was standing in front of a soda machine saying, "You are a dumb looking button. You don't have much of a future, either. People are going to be punching you all your life. Then you are going to be replaced by a much better looking button." I foolishly asked what she was doing. Jill pointed to the notice on the front of the machine, which said, "Depress button for ice."
Originally published November 14, 2002.