The "Whys" of Life
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there Interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
If 7/11 is open 24 hours a day 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they get Teflon to stick to the pan?
If you are in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn the headlights on?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, its called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, its called cargo?
You know that indestructible little black box that is used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why is it that when you are driving and looking for an address, you turn the volume down on the radio?
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Psychiatrists say one out of four people have some mental illness. Check three friends. If they are OK, then you're it.
If you are given an open book exam in school, its for sure that's the day you forgot your book.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.
You can't fall off the floor.
Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.
Originally published November 14, 2002.
