Words of Wisdom
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. - English Professor, Ohio University
ON MARTIAL ARTS AND METAPHYSICS
Deja Fu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you've been kicked in the head like this before.
ON HUMILITY
To err is human, to moo is bovine.
ON DEEP THOUGHTS
A day without sunshine is like a TV without a screen. - rubin
ON PROBLEM SOLVING
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail.
ON MATERIALISM
He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
ON INFINITY
If you had everything, where would you keep it?
ON ECONOMICS
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
ON REVISIONIST HISTORY
What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?
ON MATERIAL SCIENCE
Character density: The number of very weird people in any university.
ON EXTINCTION
Save the whales. Eat broccili.
ON LITERATURE
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown away with great force. -- Dorothy Parker
ON PROPHECY
The meek shall inherit the earth -- they are too weak to refuse.
ON WORLD POLITICS
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
Originally published November 14, 2002.
