"The OTHER Things you don't want to hear during surgery"

* FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!! * And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape. * Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough. * Uh-oh. * I don't know where that came from! Just put it over there. * Better crank up that anesthesia. * I don't think that was supposed to come off. * Gonna have to stop here, his insurance won't pay for the rest. * Well, it's five o'clock! We'll just put this off till tomorrow. * Hey....maybe the janitor knows what this is. * Cool! These colors are giving me flashbacks.
Originally published November 14, 2002.