Life Explained

On the second day the Lord created dog. And to the dog, the Lord said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." Dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten. So the Lord agreed.

On the third day Lord created monkey. The Lord said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span." Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay? And the Lord agreed again.

On the fourth day the Lord created man. The Lord said, "Eat, sleep, play, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty years."

Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten monkey gave back, and the ten dog gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said the Lord. "You've got a deal."

So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.