Jay Leno Classics
"Gas prices continue to rise. At the gas station near my house they have a slot for your credit card and one right next to it for your 401K."
"President Bush spoke with the Amish. He didn't want to, but it was the only group he could find that wasn't upset about the high price of gas."
"As you know, the government takes 40 percent of what you make. The other 60 percent, of course, taken by the gas stations."
"President Bush signed a big $286 billion highway bill yesterday. The sad part, $285 billion of it is for gas money."
"President Bush had lunch with U.S. troops yesterday. It's been exactly two years since the fall of Baghdad and just as Bush predicted, Baghdad fell, Iraq fell, Saddam fell -- the only thing that didn't fall was the price of gas."
"How many have seen 'March of the Penguins'?...You know why they're marching? . .
They can't afford gas."
Originally published September 07, 2005.
